psyche29: A brown eye with rainbow eyeliner all around it (Default)
2017-07-13 10:58 pm

So cool.

[personal profile] rthstewart, I saw this today and all I could think about was Jalur. Thought you might like to see. ♡

Also, forgive me, I can't figure out embedding at the moment.
psyche29: A brown eye with rainbow eyeliner all around it (Default)
2017-03-22 07:04 pm


So for Christmas of 2015, hubby gave me a set of knitting needles, a skein of yarn, and a book after I mentioned maybe wanting to learn to knit.

Basically, I would see all this gorgeous, yummy yarn at the store and want a scarf. And while I have a few knitting friends, I couldn't bring myself to infringe on their time and ask them to make me one.

So it took a good amount of time poring over the book - and finding a good YouTube channel - before I finally got anywhere. Let me tell y'all, I thought I was too stupid to knit for nearly a full month.

Now I can say proudly that I am damn good at the knit (garter) stitch. I can do several other stitches, and have made a few scarves.

I'm pretty apprehensive, though, about trying other things. I find that I would rather have some one-on-one instruction, because not everything is easily understandable from the book or YouTube. I may check out the local yarn shop, see what they offer. I will also probably look at JoAnn or Michael's, too, see what they've got.

In the meantime, however, I've had to cut myself off from buying yarn. Man it's almost as bad as books, I can't seem to stop!

Does anyone else knit? What do you like to make best? What's your favorite yarn?
psyche29: Emma Watson with her head to the side and mouth wide open in a laugh, text "laugh" (laugh)
2017-02-24 03:18 pm


FB memories today shows me an update I made 02/24/2011:

Puberty discussion w/ Boychild tonight. I said an egg is about the size of a period at the end of a sentence.

Boychild wants perspective: "Yeah, but what font?"

Still one of the damn funniest things he has ever uttered!
psyche29: A brown eye with rainbow eyeliner all around it (Default)
2017-02-22 06:24 pm


I say it every time, but it's true every time: it's been AGES since I last posted.

So much has happened, though looking back at it, it seems like piddly stuff.

Also, I forgot how to code a cut, so I apologize in advance for the length.

Boychild: IS EIGHTEEN YEARS OLD. Seriously, where the eff does the time go?! He VOTED in November. (Not for the JOKE currently in office, TYVM. Kid is a hard-ass lefty. Why, yes - I AM proud of it.)

He also has been on meds since about September of 2015; he definitely hits the ADHD scale, though noticeably without the H. Doc's got him on 20 mgs of Adderall a day, with 5 mg supplements as needed after school for homework. It has definitely helped to start, though he may actually need to up it a little, as we are still having to drag him through getting homework turned in and remembering things.

Hubby: Had a vertical sleeve gastrectomy in March 2015. He's since lost about 200 lbs, can buy clothes at regular stores now, and no longer hits the diabetic scale. He was off all diabetic meds within a couple months of the surgery. He is basically the poster boy for "Doing This Right;" I've never seen a surgeon bounce on his toes with pleasure before.

He's hit a plateau now, and has fallen off the diet changes a little, but is getting back on track now with this unseasonably nice weather. It's been a total life change for him, and he's really happy about all of it.

Me & Food: As part of the process (and in the name of being supportive), I started watching my diet, too. I hated every effing second of it and it didn't matter that I continued to lose weight, it took all the effing joy out of food and I hated everyone and everything. We bond over food, come together as a society over food, and having to watch it carefully like that - and deny myself of everything I love because everything that tastes good to me is "bad" - is the absolute worst. And it was harder, too, because Hubby was having the easiest time of it, and couldn't understand how it could possibly be difficult. I stayed silent about a lot of my anger over it.

I had actually started losing weight the previous August (2014); suffice it to say I had a week where Imodium was not working, so I just had to suffer through it. I must have lost ten to fifteen pounds that week alone, and so I continued to lay off the soda so much and stopped eating the snack cakes and stuff entirely. So when hubby started his pre-op diet, I started actually using the My Fitness Pal app every day, and it mostly sucked. I was almost always hungry, meals generally did not last me till the next one. I had enough calories available to me that I could have snacks, but I really had to watch it. I'd switched to diet sodas, which sucks because they all taste terrible, but I want soda more than I want to avoid the taste, and regular soda has too many calories, so-.

Since then, I've lost a total of about 80 lbs, give or take 5, and gone down 6 pants sizes and 3 shirt sizes (depending on the brand). Other noticeable changes are that I can sit in a chair with arms and the arms no longer dig into my thighs, and all my rings are too big, as they keep sliding around my fingers willy-nilly.

I don't religiously record my calories each day, and I stopped denying myself of all the things I love, because I've always said that's no way to diet. I do try to be very reasonable about how much I eat, and I try to avoid too much bread, because it's a freaking killer (even though it's OMGSODELICIOUS). I may not be actively losing weight now, but I'm also not gaining it back, so I'm much happier. We try to walk more, too.

Work: Never dull. I've done so much since my last work-related post. We've lost two supervisors, a manager, another supervisor, and plenty of people have retired because they just couldn't deal with the stress anymore. Another one is leaving in the next 45 days or so. It's sad, but maybe it will help mgmt (wishful thinking, right?) to reorganize the way they want. Some things are better, others are as bad as usual. But hey, I've got 18 years under my belt now, and am currently only minorly stressed, so I'll stick with it.

Also, I now work from home full time. It's AWESOME. They provided us zero clients, two monitors, keyboard, mouse, all necessary wires, a really decent phone with a headset, and anything off our desks we needed; I came home with well over $1.5K worth of equipment. We have flex time on top of this, so as long as I get my 40 hours in M-F between 6A and 6P, I can do it almost any way I like. This, of course, means I roll out of bed around 5:45 in the morning, lurch into the bathroom, pull on pants and shirt, then stumble to my desk, turn on the computer, and clock in by 6:00 AM. It is the BEST THING EVER.

I might not have gone home full time, though, without my two best friends leaving. One (CK) quit September 2014...about 3 hours after I unwittingly provided the clinching argument for it. He is SO. MUCH. HAPPIER. now; it is amazing how relaxed he is now without this place eating holes in his stomach lining, among other things. We try to get out for lunch or dinner (and in one case, breakfast) every other month or so, and chat via FB messenger quite a bit - which is good, because it took me a long time to get used to not having him there at work.

And in November 2015, the other (MG) quit. Also a good thing, she was much happier at a new place - understandably, as my current coworkers, by and large, were absolute DICKS to her the entire time she was employed. An old supervisor (who, incidentally, was fired for having sex on her desk and bragging about it, and also for calling someone in mgmt a "bitch" in an email that replied to all instead of one person) had actually known MG, and told everybody so, and so most people assumed MG only got the job because she knew said supervisor...and everyone hated that supervisor, to be clear. It was awful. So MG finally left, but now I can't even see her like I used to because she moved out of state in December 2016. So sad.

Other Stuff: Dad had a heart attack Thanksgiving night, but is doing okay now; it wasn't massive, and the blockages, which range anywhere from 30-80%, are all down in the smaller vessels at the bottom of the heart, where they can't put stents anyway, so they're treating medically. He's doing taxes again for H&R Block, managing only one office this year instead of two. And thrilled as hell, because he and Mom turn 62 this year and are taking early Social Security, so he won't have to work at all next year.

Mom's doing well; good days and bad days with fibro and diabetes. She had a month-long bout with seizures in August 2013, but hasn't had any since then, and is now off the seizure med entirely. She's mostly back to baseline (by which I mean she feels as good as she did before the seizures, but has less of a filter). The seizures at the time seemed to have caused a metric shit-ton of brain damage, but she gained all of her faculties back for the most part.

One of my sisters is pregnant with her fourth child, another had her second a few years ago. Yet another is happily living with her boyfriend. And the other one is still living with our parents.

TV: Missing DWTS right about now, but loving BBT still, as well as Flash, Mom, Two Broke Girls, and Brooklyn 9-9. Also really enjoying The Grand Tour on Amazon. Have also finally started watching bits and pieces of HIMYM with Boychild. Pretty good.

Man, I forgot how time can fly when you're typing up a post like this!

I hope everything is well with all of you! ♥
psyche29: A brown eye with rainbow eyeliner all around it (rainbow eyes)
2014-09-04 02:46 pm

And the beat goes on...

Jeez, louisus, it has been forever. Life happens and goes on and I am exceedingly, deplorably lazy, so I've left journaling by the wayside for a while.

Hoping all is well - if you have a minute, leave me a cliff's notes on how you're doing in the comments? Pretty please?

I aim to start posting again, though we'll see how that goes as I've foolishly signed up for yet another time-drain (Dad's teaching tax classes for H&R Block - good grief).
psyche29: A brown eye with rainbow eyeliner all around it (Default)
2013-12-06 11:49 am
psyche29: A brown eye with rainbow eyeliner all around it (rainbow eyes)
2013-03-17 04:24 pm

So much fun!

Okay, so I've spent a bit of time over the last week thoroughly enjoying this three-sentence ficathon thing that [personal profile] rthstewart has going on over here.

It took me a while to jump in, but I'm glad I did. I've filled two or three prompts (four? I have no idea, I'll have to go find them and put them in here at some point), and even made some prompts of my own. I may even do some more.

Go have a peek if you're interested, it's not specific to any one fandom, and I really am having a blast with it.

Prompts I've Filled:

1. Avengers, Bruce/Natasha, so shock me - [personal profile] vialethe
2. Narnia, Lucy and Peter (or Lucy/Peter), joy and strength - [personal profile] starbrow
3. Narnia/Avengers, Susan/Hawkeye, the target - [ profile] saoirse7
4. any, any, "This is the way the world ends. / Not with a bang, but a whimper." - [personal profile] tiny_white_hats
5. Narnia, Pevensies, and as we move from dusk to dusk/what will survive of us is love/and even if it's not enough, it's something good - [personal profile] vialethe
6. Any, any, you use your heart as a weapon - [personal profile] betony

Prompts I've Given (That Others Have Filled So Beautifully):

1. Dark Is Rising/rthstewart's Narnia cross, Will + Susan, royal mien - filled by [personal profile] pencildragon11
2. Narnia, Eustace +/ Jill, it seemed like a good idea at the time - filled by [personal profile] wingedflight and [personal profile] autumnia
3. Avengers, Steve Rogers, these little wonders still remain - filled by [ profile] saoirse7 and [personal profile] lar_laughs
4. Narnia, Susan (+/ any), never even noticed we're suddenly crumbling - filled by [personal profile] vialethe
psyche29: little girl watching something with an uncertain look on her face (mary secret garden)
2012-12-07 12:47 pm

The first step has been taken.

Thank you for all your thoughts and suggestions regarding Boychild. There were several points made that I would not have considered on my own, and I really, really appreciate the support, no matter how large or small.

I called his health plan's member services today to ask them where and how to start. We don't need a referral for this kind of thing according to them, so I said where I'd like to take him, they told me it was perfectly okay to take him there, and gave me a phone number. The clinic is closed on Fridays, so I'll be calling them on Monday to start the ball rolling.

I am anxious to get going, and - somewhat selfishly - to stop being upset with him so much. He seems to have inherited several of the issues my sister deals with, which just adds a whole new level of irritation for me. He is different enough, though, that I don't look at him and only see my sister, so that's something.

I am aware that this is very vague and that the way I explain things is not quite chronological or coherent; I always find I'm leaving things out. There are so many feelings and thoughts that go into everything that I'm not certain I know the best way to lay them out. I'm not averse to discussing anything, so if you're curious or have a question, by all means, ask.

And if you don't, that's okay, too. ;)

I think I better think up a tag for this. And maybe go get some hair dye, because there are more white ones there than I am willing to continue seeing.
psyche29: A brown eye with rainbow eyeliner all around it (harder to breathe)
2012-12-01 02:59 pm


Okay, so.

I am feeling stupid and useless and sheepish and embarrassed about this. I shouldn't, it's not my fault, it's not his fault, blah blah blah, but--.

Does anybody have any knowledge or suggestions or experience or opinions with getting a child tested for possible mental or emotional disorders?

I am--. I don't even know how to explain. I DON'T UNDERSTAND THIS.

Boychild is fourteen years old, but there is so very little he does that makes me think he is developing normally. Hubby is finally starting to see my point, and I just. I don't know what to do. Do I take him to his regular doctor first? It's not physical, but does that matter? I am just at a loss.

This kid cannot ever answer a question with more than "I don't know" or "Meh" and a shrug. When we ask him what he's thinking, he is at a loss for words and cannot tell us. He hates reading, sincerely believes we are punishing him when we expect him to do so, but swears up one side and down the other that reading is not hard for him. He cannot understand vocabulary that I know eight-year-olds can grasp (he had to ask today what "extra-mild" meant!!!!), and his social skills are on par with kindergarteners.

I love that he is a fairly happy kid, but he is FOURTEEN, not six!! I love that he is not embarrassed to be seen with us and that he is affectionate and loving, but he thinks it is appropriate to group hug in the middle of a grocery store aisle and giggles like a lunatic when we try to inform him seriously that now is not the time. Which, of course, makes me feel like a slug. BUT FOURTEEN!!!

He repeatedly tells the same jokes over and over again, long after everyone is sick and tired of hearing them, and never grasps that no one is laughing anymore. Then he gets upset when someone tells him it's not funny anymore and says that no one ever thinks he's funny! I don't get it!

We still have to tell him - every single morning - that he must put on deodorant. He has needed to do so since he was nine. Should he not be doing it on his own by now? We have to remind him, and then he does it extremely grudgingly. He likes showers, but has never once taken one of his own volition. We have to tell him to do so, and he sighs like we're expecting him to bring us the moon. He seems perfectly happy being filthy. How is that even remotely normal for a teenage boy?

He continues to do things we've repeatedly asked him not to do, and laughs like it's hilarious when we get upset that he's doing it again.

I feel so angry with him all the time, and I hate it so much. But I feel that this goes so far beyond my own impatience. There is something so very, very wrong, and I don't know where to start looking for help. Looking at the criteria list for ADD and ADHD, I think that he doesn't hit the ADHD requirements, but he does hit every. single. item. on the ADD list, but I just don't think that explains everything.

So. Please. Tell me your thoughts. Tell me your experiences if applicable, and your ideas and suggestions. I am starting to think that we must be unfit parents. I'm not looking for reassurance or accolades or anything like that, just-. I am so not equipped for this. Help us. Please. If he needs help, I want to get it for him. I just don't know how.
psyche29: A brown eye with rainbow eyeliner all around it (glow)
2012-11-12 11:49 am


Wow, it's been a while. Which, of course, I say every time I post, and it doesn't encourage me to post more often. *rolls eyes at self*

Nothing too much is new; work is as beastly and deplorable as ever, so I'm viewing and applying for other positions every week.

Hubby and Boychild are both in good health and happy. Boychild is trying wrestling this winter at school - we don't have the slightest idea why, but hey, it's exercise. He'll do tennis again in the spring.

My parents and sister were approved to move into our apartment complex, and they actually got to have the one right across the hall from us. This is a really awesome thing, and so we've been busy helping them move in bit by bit each weekend lately. We both leave our doors unlocked during the day, which enables us to just go back and forth between the two apartments. They don't have a microwave yet, so they come over to use ours; if someone's in one bathroom, we can go across the hall to use the other one. It's just really nice, too, having them right there.

We've also been going to the Y when we can. Not often lately, but things have calmed a little, so we're going to try a few visits this week. We all love the pool, though we're going to try more with the weights, too.

Finally got a new library card (my wallet was stolen a couple years ago and I just never replaced the card), so we've been in and out of the library again. Have a few books on hold, but can't pick them up till tomorrow. Hubby's getting both The Zombie Survival Guide: Complete Protection From the Living Dead and World War Z: An Oral History of the Zombie War (Max Brooks), and I'm getting Dreams From My Father (Barack Obama), What's So Amazing About Grace (Philip Yancey) and His Majesty's Dragon (Naomi Novik). I hear so many good things about the Temeraire series, I decided it was high time I looked it up and tried it. Thoughts?

I should really update my reading list here, but will wait on that one - formatting takes too long and I am too lazy at the moment.

In the meantime, I've been reading lots of Narnia fic, specifically [ profile] rthstewart's work on both AO3 and - it is fantastic stuff and so worth the time it's taken to get through it all. The world-building is phenomenal and the writing exceptional.

I don't think I've anything else to report. How is everyone?
psyche29: A brown eye with rainbow eyeliner all around it (water and lemons)
2012-08-21 03:46 pm
Entry tags:

Pork Spareribs: Success!

We've had a package of pork spareribs in the deep freeze for quite a while now, mainly because neither my husband nor I had ever tried making them before.

So we took them out yesterday morning, and I found a fairly simple recipe HERE that had the bonus of not requiring three hours to cook, and we decided to try it.

And OMG, it was FANTASTIC.

I would have pictures, but we scarfed those things probably faster than is good for digestion.

I highly recommend them. The poster there said it was his or her Brazilian mother's recipe. I didn't have limes or lime juice on hand, so I used the lemons we had instead, and also added a bit of Worcestershire sauce. Hubby thought they tasted more Greek than Brazilian, but as he was sucking his fingers clean at the time, it certainly wasn't a complaint.

Recipe Under the Cut! )

Let me know if you make them, and what you do differently...and of course, how it comes out!
psyche29: A brown eye with rainbow eyeliner all around it (rainbow eyes)
2012-08-07 08:30 am

Mid-Vacation Photo Dump

Having such a lovely time, really pleased so far. Here, have a few pictures.

Nine hours in the sunshine and the pool brings out those freckles like whoa.
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My niece is made of sweet potatoes, and my God, I could not get enough of her. Neither could Hubby - open-mouth baby kisses are just the best, no?
Image and video hosting by TinyPic

Here they are again:
Image and video hosting by TinyPic

She finally passed out after seven hours or so:
Image and video hosting by TinyPic

Of course, this is what "not sleeping" looks like when Boychild does it. You know, every time.
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And we stopped in DC yesterday and thrilled Boychild with a trip up to the Washington Monument. He was dying to take a picture, and he got several, including this one.
Image and video hosting by TinyPic

Vacation is going well, and we're looking forward to visits with my grandfather and great aunt today. I LOVE vacation.
psyche29: A brown eye with rainbow eyeliner all around it (not being entertained)
2012-07-10 04:35 pm

What fresh fuckery is this, brain?

Lately in our household, we've been considering - very seriously - the idea of joining the YMCA. And too, actually going there a few times a week to walk, use the weights, swim, whatever.

This is insane.

I hate exercise with the burning passion of a billion effulgent suns. Every single fiber of my being is screaming bloody murder at the top of its (huh, that feels like the wrong identifier) lungs. Motherfucker, I just want to lie down and READ. I have absolutely no interest whatsoever in getting up and moving.

But somehow, this errant common sense and completely ridiculous and misplaced desire to "get in better shape" (you know, besides round) is winning out, and I am conflicted HATE it. And even being absolutely livid about it isn't stopping me from probably doing it.

I can only assume this means that I have officially gained "adult" status and really am as old as Boychild believes I am. Otherwise, there is something very wrong with me AND I WANT IT TO STOP NOW, PLSKTHX.

I never, ever thought I'd say this, but getting older sucks.

Or maybe it's not the getting older part, but the realizing it that sucks. I am not amused.
psyche29: A brown eye with rainbow eyeliner all around it (harder to breathe)
2012-06-21 12:33 pm


It's probably not a good thing when a combination of events at work end up with you having a minor meltdown at your desk. Right?
psyche29: Marvin the Martian, arms crossed with text "very angry indeed" (very angry indeed)
2012-06-20 04:32 pm

Work Woes.

I hate my job.

Stop, rephrase. I hate what my job has become.

It's been a while since I bitched about work, so I might as well dive back in while my frustration is raging, right?

Everything has been fucked up and busy as hell since, oh, the last time I posted about work. Which was, admittedly, last year. Nothing got any better, and then someone decided to merge the professional billing with the hospital billing WITH ONLY THREE MONTHS WORTH OF PLANNING.

Which, of course, fucked everything into a billion more pieces than it already was, so you can imagine the headaches in this place.

My dipshit coworker finally retired at the end of April, but did literally NO* work the whole last week, and of course the only other person who knew how to do it was me.

Then they moved cash application down to yet another new manager and supervisor, and these ones, we've discovered, are micro-managers. We've been on our own for the better part of eight years, and suddenly we're under what feels like a microscope.

"You should only be taking two minutes in the bathroom."

"You need to fill out this stat sheet every single day."

"You need to log how many phone calls you get and how long each one takes."

And a bunch of other piddly things that while they do add up, it takes me fifteen to thirty minutes just to do the motherfucking recording of all this shit, and then they ask, "What took you this half hour?" and "You were gone from your desk for four minutes, what were you doing?" Well Jesus Christ on motherfucking stilts, calculating all that shit took half an hour alone! And I was in the bathroom for four minutes; if you can do it in two, then don't touch me or anything on my desk because you aren't cleaning yourself or your hands properly. Two minutes. It takes thirty seconds to walk there and another thirty to walk back, I cannot pee that fast, SUE ME. Fuckers.

I've been trying to train people and so I'm pulled away from my desk just as much as before, yet they're unable to see that it cuts into the time I should be able to use for actually posting the damn cash. It's like I'm back to the first couple years with my first supervisor here, and I am just about ready to tell them to fuck themselves running. Like, literally - just leave all of this stuff to them. They have NO idea what's untouched yet, because I can't get past this other shit Asshole McBastardPants left. It's a vicious cycle and there's just no end in sight.

I have been trying to be open minded about things because I know I resist change like nobody's business (Look, I just think you should make it perfectly clear - preferably with examples/proof - that the changes will make things better and smoother and not be a pain in everyone's collective damn ass, okay?), but I've given it over a month now and it should have gotten better but hasn't.

Impatient? Me? Damn skippy.


*No, seriously, he did NOTHING the whole last week. He ignored everything that came up that was his, walked around and chatted with people, made appointments to talk to people in HR and was basically everywhere but his desk. When his ass actually managed to find his desk chair, he only took small piles of work THAT HE'D ALREADY DONE and pretended to look them up so it looked like he was working. I WATCHED HIM DO THIS. It wasn't surprising, really, but at the same time, just-. WTF.
psyche29: pale green background with text "i need to be drunker" (drunker)
2012-06-01 07:41 pm

A Bit of an Update

The last two weeks have been absolutely crazy here.

Hubby had a sore backside for no discernible reason about three weeks ago. Fast forward to today, and we've had two urgent care visits, an ER visit, one surgery clinic followup and a diabetes clinic visit. Long story short, an abscess burst, the skin roof came off and it got infected, so now there's twice-daily home wound care (aren't I the luckiest thing), Type 2 Diabetes (full-blown, no mistakes, he's got it), and, like, seven different prescriptions. Well, seven prescriptions PLUS a blood glucose meter, finger stabbers lancets and testing strips.

Along with all of that, the idle air control valve in the car decided it was done being operational, so we've been needing to rely on rides from my dad and anyone else who was willing until the part arrived, because no bloody store carried it, it was special order in all of them. ALL OF THEM. *takes deep breath* The part arrived today, and we also had to swing by the dealership for some kind of gasket thing.

I stayed home from work all week, which was nice, although the reason for it wasn't so nice. But, exhausted from all the running around, I haven't cleaned much of anything.

I did manage to finish my submission for the [personal profile] hp_porninthesun fest, so I'm excited for that; posting started today! :D I'm not as pleased with my submission this year as I was last year, but I like it well enough, so hopefully my recipient will, too.

How are all of you?
psyche29: A brown eye with rainbow eyeliner all around it (marvin hmph)
2012-05-11 08:27 am

An Open Letter

Dear Bicyclists,

In this state, you are a vehicle just like any other and do not have right of way or special privileges just by virtue of being a bike. Asking if we want to suck your penis does not change the fact that you are required to follow the laws.

All the Animosity In the World,

As a side note: Man, am I glad it's Friday.
psyche29: A brown eye with rainbow eyeliner all around it (not being entertained)
2012-04-13 02:19 pm
Entry tags:



I didn't realize how badly this shirt drops in the front, or how often. How many people today have gotten a bigger eyeful of my ta-tas than I am comfortable with?!

Note to self: Burn shirt once home.
psyche29: A brown eye with rainbow eyeliner all around it (harder to breathe)
2012-03-18 09:20 pm


Falling apart.

I am fucking falling apart.

I've spent nearly this entire evening alternating between crying and gagging up acid spit. I believe, friends, that I've developed my first ever case of heartburn.

And I cannot handle it. Hubby is out being heroic right now and buying Tums and some other OTC med so that I have it handy; I'm currently pain-free, but as this has been happening daily for nearly a week, I'm not expecting this is over.
psyche29: Tea in a white cup and saucer, sitting on a pink placemat (tea)
2012-03-16 08:20 am

The Friday Five

I haven't done one of these in a while, so I thought I'd post one. As this week's question set hasn't been posted yet, I'll answer last week's. :)

Bedtime! )