Why bother?

Oct. 1st, 2010 10:38 am
psyche29: A brown eye with rainbow eyeliner all around it (care so little)
[personal profile] psyche29
So that job opening I wanted to apply for... Not only might I be fucked if they are adamant about wanting someone who is bilingual, but I found out yesterday that right now, they only want people WHO ARE ALREADY IN THAT JOB CLASS!! Which is shitty on several levels, the worst ones being "I did the job three years ago and did it really well" and "I should actually already be in that job class as a lead worker but no one, least of all the manager or HR, wanted to allow me to have the resultant wage increase because 'everybody's cutting back.'" If they don't get any suitable applicants who are already senior reps or bilingual, THEN I might have a shot. It's so unfair, I can't even--. *deep breaths*

And this WOMAN. Oh my God, I want to BITE HER. She thinks that now, since she's completely isolated me and made me her little prisoner, I can just get all that money posted within a few days and it'll be YAY ALL CAUGHT UP. Um, NO. Fuckwit. There are so many other things that have to be done first, this money won't all be posted until God knows when. It's not at your fucking, completely unreasonable demand, you kumquat-sucking, toad-licking bubble-fuck. AND THEN!! Judy comes up to me yesterday to ask me a question, and mentions that "Victoria asked me to help you with corporate accounts."

WHAT THE BLOODY FUCK?! asdf;lkj(&^$$#5!!!!!

This is happening with several people, who NO, CANNOT HELP ME! She's asking everyone for help for me, not telling me about any of it, and then refuses to help out other managers when they ask her. WHY DOES SHE STILL WORK HERE. *!&@%%$#^%!)@*#^!!!

I'm so jaded and so defeated, but I can't quit because I have a family to support. If it was just me, I'd go work two jobs at McDonald's and Barnes & Noble and just be done with it, but I can't do that to them, they need the security I can provide them, and the steady income.

If you (or someone you know) are within 25 miles of where I live and have a full-time, liveable-waged, benefit-earning position open, give me a call, hmm? Not that I want to be picky, but something finance- or administrative assistant-related would probably be a plus. I may not have that precious "degree" all these places keep harping on about, but I learn quickly and will work my arse off for you for little more than a paycheck and respect.

Here's the last few days of that meme:

Day 28 – Something That You Miss

I miss lots of things, but most of them revolve around my grandmother. She's been gone twenty-three years now, but I still miss her. And too, all the things I associated with her: wild roses, rocking chairs, bathtubs full of bubbles, cuckoo clocks, plums, lilies of the valley, the old piano, curling up with her in her recliner. Nothing in my life has ever quite made up for what I - and everyone, really - lost when she passed.

Day 29 – Your Aspirations

I don't know. I don't aspire to much at the moment. What I'd like most is the financial security to stay at home, and to volunteer my time to a charity I believe in. I'd like to write, assuming I could ever actually construct a whole bloody plot (as we all know plots are totally my downfall). If I didn't have ridiculously crippling stage fright, I'd sing. I suppose my immediate goal, for now, is to find a different work place.

Day 30 – One Last Moment

Several years ago, I had a supervisor who was an absolute nightmare. She was recently divorced and bitter and took it out on all her employees, and was a thorn in my side until one day, I called her out on her actions over something I didn't believe I deserved. I sent a long, detailed email that acknowledged any wrong that could have been committed by myself, then castrated her calmly, coolly and professionally.

I then sat in my chair on tenterhooks the rest of the day, terrified I was going to be fired. Then it happened - I had an email from her. I privately freaked out about it for five minutes, then just decided to rip off the bandage and opened it. It said, "You're right, I'm sorry."

I almost fell off my chair. But from that moment on, she and I got along perfectly, and I learned how to stand up for myself when I've been grievously wronged. It may make me more difficult to live with now, but I'm doing what's best for me so that I can give my best to others. And that's a big deal.

The 30-Day Meme List

Day 01 - Introduce Yourself
Day 02 – Your First Love
Day 03 – Your Parents
Day 04 – What You Ate Today
Day 05 – Your Definition Of Love
Day 06 – Your Day
Day 07 – Your Best Friend
Day 08 – A Moment
Day 09 – Your Beliefs
Day 10 – What You Wore Today
Day 11 – Your Siblings
Day 12 – What’s In Your Bag
Day 13 – This Week
Day 14 – What You Wore Today
Day 15 – Your Dreams
Day 16 – Your First Kiss
Day 17 – Your Favorite Memory
Day 18 – Your Favorite Birthday
Day 19 – Something You Regret
Day 20 – This Month
Day 21 – Another Moment
Day 22 – Something That Upsets You
Day 23 – Something That Makes You Feel Better
Day 24 – Something That Makes You Cry
Day 25 – A First
Day 26 – Your Fears
Day 27 – Your Favorite Place
Day 28 – Something That You Miss
Day 29 – Your Aspirations
Day 30 – One Last Moment
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